Forgive me please to the rather direct and perhaps slightly outrageous title of this piece.

I mean you might well argue that a man can’t make a woman come, that ultimately it’s always down to her — whether or not a woman to choose orgasm depends on many factors, but primarily, perhaps, her emotional and mental state.

Nonetheless, whilst I’d philosophically agree with this, what I’d also make absolutely clear is that many women, the help of a partner is absolutely essential in reaching orgasm — and furthermore, men in particular like to do this because it really boosts their ego.

When I find a situation like this over and over again with in relationship, I was asked myself whether or not they might actually be some biological imperative at work here.

At least for many women, being brought to orgasm by the man is a demonstration of his affection for her, and her attractiveness. For the man there’s a similar process at work. He feels strong, powerful, and a sexually adept male because he’s managed to bring his partner to orgasm.

Now whether or not you agree with this is perhaps an irrelevance, because what really matters is whether or not women are enjoying orgasms.

The sad fact of the matter is that it appears to be almost impossible for a certain percentage women to experience orgasm.  There’s a lot of debate and discussion about why this might be, but I think that it’s probably because they’ve never met a man who is actually created an area of safety for them where they can relax and go into their orgasm.

It might also be of course that a woman is fundamentally frightened of the loss of control that accompanies the process of orgasm, and isn’t actually willing to let herself go into that space. See this for more on how to take a woman to orgasm.

If that is due to emotional or sexual abuse as a child, then it’s clearly a necessary for woman to get psychotherapy to overcome this, or, perhaps, to have a loving partner who has the time and patience to seducing culture into a emotional state where she can experience the pleasure of orgasm.

I rather think that most of us, the problem is a bit more fundamental than this. It is simply that the man is generally not informed about how to bring a woman to orgasm. He lacks the information that he needs around sexual techniques to be able to give her an orgasm easily and quickly.

Now one of the things that can confuse men is whether or not there is any difference between a vaginal and clitoral  orgasm. I know a lot of women cannot reach orgasm during intercourse. However, although very few women reach orgasm during intercourse, very few men can actually last long enough to provide enough stimulation to enable a woman fulfill her potential to achieve vaginal orgasm!

It seems to me that very few men are actually aware of the duration of stimulation needed for most women to reach orgasm.  This is a stunning and fundamental problem with sexual knowledge on the part of men.

So what’s to be done about this, particularly since so many women complain about not reaching orgasm?

I think the answer is probably education of one form or another, and there’s no better place to look to sex education on the Internet.

However many men watch porn. This does not represent how the majority of sexual interactions between men and women take place.

Having said that, the point I’m getting at is that what’s needed is education for men about bringing woman to orgasm. Education which matches the common experiences of men and women in relationship, where sex can be quite mundane. Education and information is needed to make sure that sex is lively and exciting enough to want to do it! And sexual education is needed to make sure that a man knows how to bring a woman to orgasm satisfactorily.

It’s not even being jaundiced about how most people perform sexually. It’s a simple matter of fact: education is everything.

Jason Julius is one such educator. He provides sexual information and education men in a way that isn’t available anywhere else, at least as far as I’m aware. His work is called “The Female Orgasm Blueprint”

This does actually represent a plan by which men can reliably take a woman to orgasm, and in fact, to be more exact, it actually allows men to bring a woman to both a clitoral and G spot orgasms in fairly short order.

In this he emphasises the necessity for men to engage in foreplay to ensure that woman’s aroused sufficiently to reach orgasm. It’s a program which offers a very well-balanced and informative system of education about female orgasm for men who need it.